I was probably in my late teens when I first heard the phrase “the change”. That’s around the time I remember my mother, who was 29 years older than I, began to experience unpredictable behaviors and tendencies. She’d fan herself or dab her head with a handkerchief or napkin. She’d make frequent requests to adjust the air or heat at odd times. One minute she’d need a sweater or jacket and the next she didn’t. The slightest movement or shortest distance caused her to become flush and sweltry. As I stared in amazement wondering what was wrong with her, she’d say, “I’m alright, baby — I’m just going through the change!” That’s all she’d say. My mother was the utmost lady and very private. She didn’t like to cause a scene or make a spectacle of herself. I could see the change made life awkward and embarrassingly uncomfortable for her, but she dealt with it the best she could in her ladylike manner.
At some point, I learned the change refers to the experiences related to menopause. When my mother passed away two years ago, my mind flooded with memories of lessons I learned from her, many spoken but most unspoken. The change was one of those topics we didn’t get to talk about in detail, mainly because I hadn’t reached that season of womanhood. And during the last twelve years of my mother’s life, she had other serious health matters that took priority over everything. Thinking back on that challenging time, I rarely heard her mention the change. I realized she had to weather the change while battling major health issues, which couldn’t have been easy.
This past summer, a few weeks before my 49th birthday, early signs of the change rushed in like a monsoon. And all I could think about was my mother. One of the worst times was when I was dining with family at a restaurant, and I got profusely hot, sweaty, and nauseous while eating. I tried to fan myself with my hand, wipe my head with a napkin, and drink water, but nothing helped. I took deep breaths. I couldn’t sit up straight so I rested my arm & head on the table. The experience gave me flashbacks of how I felt during the early months of my first pregnancy. Everyone around me could see me suffering. The saving grace was an old paper event program I found in my purse that I pulled put to use as a hand fan. The small gusts of wind slowly cooled me off and eventually I started to feel better. After having a few more episodes like that one, I searched for options to combat hot flashes, night sweats, cold streaks, sudden irritability, and poor sleep. Here are the things that are working for me as I go through seasons of the change.
Portable Fan
Four days after that terrible situation, I purchased this lifesaver JISULIFE FA43 Handheld Turbo Fan on Amazon.com. It’s a battery powered, USB-C rechargeable mini portable personal fan. It only takes 3 hours to full recharge. There are 5 speeds. The wind power is strong at every level but with low noise. It comes with a lanyard for carrying ease or can be placed safely on any surface with its bottom non-slip mat. It can be used indoors or outdoors. I keep it in my purse and pretty much carry it everywhere I go because the hot flashes are so unpredictable. Ever since I bought it, this fan has helped me avoid what could have turned into miserable moments. It has been a game-changer for me, and I plan to tell everyone woman I know about it! It’s that good! Buy fan here
Plant-based Skin Care
Aura Cacia Geranium Essential Oil
Aura Cacia Organic Rosehip Oil
Heritage Store Organic Castor Oil
Heritage Store Rosewater Spray
T.N. Dickinson’s Witch Hazel, 100% Natural Astringent
Avoid excessively hot showers, baths & hair care treatments
Brands: Aura Cacia, Heritage Rose, T. N. Dickinson’s
Whole Food Nutrition, Hydration & Supplements
Room temperature water with a dash of Himalayan sea salt, organic lemon, organic lime, or Bragg Organic Apple Cider Vinegar
Slightly warm water with organic raw honey and/or a pinch of organic spices (turmeric, black pepper, cinnamon, ginger clove, or cardamom)
Traditional Medicinals Herbal Teas – Chamomile Lavender, Turmeric, Peppermint
Organic Green Tea – Regular, Matcha Green, Genmaicha
Organic coconut water
Organic botanical sparkling waters
San Pellegrino Premium Sparkling Natural Mineral Water
Organic plant-based powders (no additives) to mix in water, juice or smoothies – greens (spirulina, chlorella, wheatgrass, moringa), beets, wildcrafted natural sea moss with bladderwrack & burdock root
Organics fruits, vegetables, roots, nuts, seeds, meat, dairy, wild caught fish & seafood
Garden of Life Mykind Organics Whole Food Multivitamin Gummies – Women’s Multi 40+
Organic evening primrose oil capsules
Wild caught fish oil (capsules or liquid)
Organic prebiotics, probiotics & digestive enzymes
Host Defense® Mushrooms
Exercise & Rest
Strengthening and conditioning with bodyweight exercises & free weights
Billy Blanks TaeBo Workouts
Yoga Poses
Walks & jogs (treadmill, in-place, or outdoors)
Rest and lower stress as much as possible. Intentional about sitting down & resting between commitments and work. Avoid burnout by not overdoing it.
Hygiene Goods
Amazon Brand – Presto! 2-Ply Toilet Paper: Ultra-Soft, Unscented. Lint control.
Organyc Feminine Care Products: 100% Certified Organic Cotton Inside and Out. Contains no perfumes, dyes, colors, wood pulp, or toxic materials. Hypoallergenic, made for sensitive skin. A patented design means they are ultra-absorbent to protect leaks. Sleek and discreet. Sustainable, biodegradable & compostable.
Tea Tree Therapy Suppository for vaginal hygiene care: An easy and safe compliment to dietary treatments. It allows the bodys natural defenses to regain control when the system has become unbalanced. Use only after a competent medical diagnosis of the symptoms and under medical supervision.
All available on Amazon.com
Support & Attitude
There is so much information about the stages of menopause but not every solution fits all. Professional help is available. Conversations with experienced women you trust can be also helpful. Learn what you can about the seasons of menopause and what will best work for your body. The seasons of menopause are inevitable. Yet, we don’t have to walk through them alone, helpless, or hopeless. As a dear sweet friend said to me recently, “We’re in this together!” So let’s not be afraid to talk about it and share with our mothers, sisters, daughters, aunts, cousins & friends. I also talk about it with my husband to help him understand what I’m going through.
Overall, the most helpful thing to me has been an adjustment in my attitude. Instead of dreading this new journey of womanhood, I’m learning more and more to be thankful I’ve made it this far in life! I try to find joy and contentment in this blessed opportunity to grow more mature and wiser. Like all seasons, the change will come and go. My goal is to do my best to thrive through it, in hopes that I can live to see all life has to offer in the next season!
This information is based on personal experience and research. Consult professional help for solutions, options, and treatment in order to maintain optimal health.
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